once i joined a group, let’s say a “serious club” which took me to a kind of serious situation where i found it difficult to release myself. people there seemed very strong in faith, and i do respect them for that reason, .. and it’s funny when i realize that i feel i don’t belong there.

i would call them a fragile club, it’s so fragile b’coz i and the others need to plunge deep down to what they call commitment that only few of us could do that. frankly speaking maybe i was the one who fragile, easy to give up, and didn’t like the challenge there.

feel like i am too ordinary, and i desperately want to be out of the ordinary,.. that’s the mistake i wouldn’t make again in the future i promised myself…

butttt……right now i think i am making the same mistake by joining such group, and not sure for how long i will “survive” there. though i might be bit different from the past, like i have more freedom to decide by my own,… still i feel sorry for what i will be doing,.. if i decide to leave… see that… in that sense, i am so fragile


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